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Crossing Over & Coming Home, by Ph.D., Liz Dale
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First ever study of gay & lesbian near-death experiences.
- Sales Rank: #4250856 in Books
- Published on: 2004-06-15
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 7.92" h x .45" w x 6.78" l,
- Binding: Paperback
- 182 pages
Most helpful customer reviews
18 of 18 people found the following review helpful.
Could have truly salvific consequences
By A Customer
Subtitled "Twenty-One Authors Discuss the Gay Near-Death Experience as Spiritual Transformation," this book concerns an absolutely fascinating and compelling phenomenon. What a great idea! Obviously gay people die too. We must have interrupted experiences of dying just like the people who are written about in books like Life After Life or depicted in movies like Resurrection. And with so many people hospitalized with life-threatening conditions resulting from AIDS, maybe we have even more such NDEs in our population.
Liz Dale, a research psychologist in San Francisco, set out to investigate this topic after hearing a speaker at the 1996 convention of the International Association for Near-Death Studies mention that there was no research on this phenomenon in the gay community. Over a couple of years, she gathered a group of about thirty gay men and lesbians. It was a liberating experience, she reports, for them being able to talk about their NDEs without fear of dismissal, ridicule, or bafflement. She has collected twenty-one of the stories for publication.
In some ways, the research did not result in the findings Dale was probably expecting. That is, most of the accounts end with the subjects' answer to a couple of questions about how their sexual orientation affected their NDE and how their NDE might have affected their attitudes toward their sexual orientation. Since the subtitle suggests the gay Near-Death Experience is a spiritual transformation, one would expect the subjects to report positive changes in these attitudes. But, in fact, almost every account ends with the subject saying their sexual orientation had NO effect and their attitudes toward it were unaffected.
Nonetheless, the accounts themselves are wonderful, moving, and even inspiring. What they seem to describe isn't so much about death, but about the mystical component of the subjects' lives. While most of the accounts are of true NDEs, that is, experiences of leaving the body following a medical emergency, like an automobile accident, several are of more generalized mystical phenomena and several are of drug-induced states (often suicidal overdoses).
The book is less important for arriving at scientific findings than for offering examples of how to think about and prepare for dying.
The NDE phenomenon seems to demonstrate that "afterlife" happens in the process of dying. The brain's shut-down procedures can be experienced as timeless and eternal and infinitely meaningful and blissful. It really doesn't matter what happens next. We can never know since truly no one comes back from having fully died. (Interestingly, even Jesus whose great saving act was dying and rising again never reported what was on the "other side." Did the Apostles just forget to ask? Maybe there is no intelligible answer.)
But if dying can provide a mystical experience of entering into bliss and reunion with all the love in one's life, then it'd be a good-and necessary-thing to prepare for it by creating some self-fulfilling prophecies for how you're going to react when you realize the time has come and you're about to die.
That's the beauty and importance of this book. It offers templates. It promises to get you thinking. It might inspire you to plan your dying.
I'd have liked this book to report that the gay people who had NDEs all said there were gay pride banners adorning the tunnel of light and that the glimpse into heaven relieved them all of any fears or misgivings about their sexuality. Well, it didn't. But it certainly got me obsessed for days about how I want to die when the time comes and inspired my meditations with positive expectations. Clearly, one of the functions of meditation should be to routinely remind ourselves of our mortality and to prepare for how we'll react when mortality is realized.
"You do not know the time nor the hour," said Jesus. "Be prepared." Liz Dale's research could have truly salvific consequences in your life-and death.
Reviewed by Toby Johnson
in the Winter 2003 issue of White Crane
A Journal of Gay Spirituality
40 of 42 people found the following review helpful.
Do All [Homosexuals] Go to Hell?
By Ed Prothro
This book examines what happens to homosexuals and lesbians after they die. This is the first (and, as of 2001, the only) book to examine the Near-Death Experiences of [homosexuals]. Other than the preface, the stories are told by the experiencers themselves. Contrary to what some fundamentalist Christians would have you believe, God and angels are not against homosexuality. One homosexual who died and was later revived asked some angels, "It it OK to be [a homosexual]?". They laughed, and said, "Who do you think created [homosexuals]?", meaning God. One [homosexual] was told by his friend who died of AIDS when he met him in heaven, "I should openly celebrate and honor my sexuality as a gift from God. This was a startling revelation to me, especially after a lifetime of secrecy, fear, and guilt." This groundbreaking research shows that [homosexuals]' ultimate fate is no different from most straight NDEs.
I didn't give it 5 stars, since the Discussion chapter was missing, although listed in the table of contents, and there were a number of misprints, especially in the appendices. Still, it is a must for those interested in NDEs or homosexuality.
[the g-word was edited from my review, even though it appears on this Web page]
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Wonderful Book!! Facsinating read!!
By Jake Milieri
I was engrossed in this personal account compilation of Near Death Experiences through the eyes of Gay men and women. It brought one obvious truth to the surface for me, that we all basically have near identical experiences in the afterlife, and there is no difference between being gay or being straight in the scheme of things. That is a truth Ive long suspected, and now I am searching for more on the subject...Liz Dale shoudl compile another book, and next time, add to it with her thoughts and act as narrator for a discussion of the stories, maybe after each one even. It would give the reader more insight from a outside perspective instead of leaving all the work to the reader. Other than that, bravo!
and those writing reviews for what I am sure is book they never read, and who quote the bible and blah blah blah...you obviously do not get it, so why are wasting your energy trying to prove your moot point? Jesus may love you, but I think he also knows you are tragic mess.
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